One More Night
by Rabidnar
Summary: After a mistake that devastated their relationship, Cameron and Remy have a harder time letting go of each other than they'd like to admit.


**Disclaimer: **I do not own House MD or its characters!

Special thank you to **Vanamo** who corrects all of my horrendous typos and offers me good lines when mine look like I typed them in the dark or something.

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**One More Night**

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_Try to tell you no, but my body keeps on telling you yes.  
__Try to tell you stop, but your lipstick got me so out of breath.  
I'll be waking up in the morning probably hating myself.  
I'll be waking up feeling satisfied but guilty as hell._

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Remy no longer lived at the studio apartment five miles away from Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital, but that didn't stop her from showing up at what was now only Cameron's place. Friday nights at nearly two A.M, Cameron noted. It was the only time she saw the brunette these days. The local bar had started closing at 1:30 and apparently the cab ride to Cameron's was cheaper than the full ride home. Or at least that's what the two of them preferred to tell themselves. It hurt to think that just five months before, Remy had been lugging her suitcases up the stairs to stay for good. Now she'd show up disheveled with a handbag and a cell that would be gone with her in the morning – usually before Cameron even got out of bed. The only trace of her would be the faint vanilla scent left on her side of the bed.

Cameron sat on an overstuffed recliner with her elbow on the arm of the chair and her head resting against her left hand. She flexed her shoulders, unconsciously trying to soothe the tension that built up there, and wanted nothing more than to be able to lay her head down fully and let her thoughts fade away. She was still dressed in her pink scrubs and her shoes had been kicked off carelessly in the middle of the floor. Her eyelids were drooping after an intense day in the ER, but the knowledge that Remy was bound to show up kept her awake. She inhaled slowly then let out the breath as her fingers entangled in her hair. She twisted the locks around her fingers so tightly that a few strands of hair snapped after cutting off circulation to her fingers. She didn't know when she had developed the stress habit. It had happened sometime between when Remy moved back out and when she started showing up again. Cameron could have changed the locks. The option presented itself every time she drove past Home Depot on the highway. But she didn't.

She _deserved_ this. She _needed_ this. Or some fucked up reason between the two. She didn't know. She pressed the heel of her hand against her temple and drew her legs up onto the chair. She waited in the same position every Friday night. _Like a dog, waiting for its master to come home_, she thought, disgusted with herself. She crossed her legs and rested her free hand on her lap, picking absently at a loose string sticking out of her pants. This was her fault and the consequences were all too gratifying. She drew in another breath that made her shudder. The anticipation of waiting for Remy to come home was almost worse than watching her show up drunk.

At 1:46, the lock jiggled. Just like Cameron knew that it would. Her eyes darted toward the door then back down to the hardwood floor. She ran her tongue over her lips as she waited for Remy to manage to finally fit the key into the hole then turn the knob. That took another minute. By the time the door finally swung open, Cameron's hands were shaking with suppressed emotion. She didn't want to fight. But she was sick of spewing apologies and Remy was more than sick of hearing them. Both Remy and Cameron were silent for a moment as Remy tugged her key out of the lock then shut the door behind her.

"Why are you here?" Cameron was first to speak up. Her voice was flat and scripted. She'd lost track of the amount of Fridays she'd gone through, but they were all the same. They followed the same lines and the same actions. The only change was the amount of exhaustion visible through their features. She didn't doubt for one second that Remy hated their routine just as much as she did. She caught her crying in the middle of the night - the _only_ time that Remy ever cried. When she thought no one was listening. Unlike Cameron who could already feel hot tears burning her eyes. She loosened her grip on her hair but continued to stare at the floor, unable to look at Remy's face. Instead, she stared at the bottoms of Remy's jeans and at her black flats. She could feel Remy's bold stare piercing right through her.

Remy breathed what sounded like a laugh at her question – as though it was the stupidest thing she had ever heard. She turned away from Cameron and crossed the room to the coffee table where a bottle of Cherry Noir sat, already opened. She picked it up and dropped her keys and phone in its place. "I could ask you the same question." Her words slurred together. She lifted the bottle to her lips and took a swig straight from it, and then wrinkled her nose as she forced herself to swallow. She never liked the fruity alcohol that Cameron kept at home. "This is _shit_," she stated. Still gripping the bottle, she turned around again.

Cameron wanted to remind her that if she didn't like it, she should start her Friday visits by searching the cupboards rather than by taking what was already on the table. She lowered her feet to the floor then pushed herself into a standing position. The room spun and she wobbled, but she managed to remain upright. Half the bottle of vodka had already found its way down her throat. She drank in hopes that the night would be a blur. But she always remembered it in the morning. Every little, painful detail etched its way into her mind and stuck there. It didn't even numb her in the moment. She still _hurt_ despite the comforting warmth that engulfed her from the inside out. She just wanted to curl up and sleep. She swallowed and wiped at her face with the back of her hand before finally looking at Remy. She glanced at her briefly, taking in her appearance without looking her in the eye. The dark circles under her eyes and the permanent frown etched across her face were evident. She never thought Remy would take a breakup this hard. Remy apparently never thought it either. Cameron, on the other hand, took everything hard.

"I want you to get out." Cameron's voice was barely more than a strangled whisper. She didn't want her to leave. Not really. She wanted to be dragging her bags back in and to be making more room in the closet again. She wanted Remy to complain that she didn't have anywhere to put her toothbrush because all of Cameron's things were cluttering the sink. She parted her lips and pinched the bridge of her nose. Her insides were burning. She tried to swallow but it felt as though someone had stuffed cotton down her throat.

"The _lease_," Remy shot, pointing at the floor, "is still half in my name. You don't get to tell me to get out." She made a dramatic hand movement toward the door, still using her pointer finger for emphasis. She dropped her hand by her side. "It's always all about what _Allison_ wants, isn't it?"

They both knew that wasn't true. Cameron hoped to God Remy knew that wasn't true. She pursed her lips together again and knitted her brows. "If it was about what _I_ wanted, I wouldn't have apologized to you!" The volume of her voice momentarily shocked them both. Cameron shocked herself more than she shocked Remy.

"You slept with _him_!" Remy pointed the liquor bottle at her, sloshing the liquid inside out onto the floor. She didn't even need to say a name. They both knew who it was.

The words hit Cameron like a blunt object to the chest. The more she heard them out loud, the more painful they became. She screwed her eyes shut to lock the tears tightly behind her eyelids. She shook her head back and forth repeatedly because she had nothing to say. _I didn't mean to_ was a useless phrase. "I wasn't thinking," she choked. The accusation strangled her like a noose. The admission tightened the knot.

"You sure as hell weren't," Remy snarled in agreement. She threw the bottle to the side and it smashed against the opposite wall. Shards of glass and puddles of vodka littered the floor.

Cameron jumped at the crash. Her eyes flew open and her head snapped in the direction of the broken bottle.

"You know, I, I don't understand you," Remy kept talking. She always had something to say, even when Cameron couldn't muster up words. "First you sleep with someone else, and then you have the nerve to _tell me_."

This was where they differed on how they thought a relationship should work. Where things fell apart.

"I didn't want to lie to you!" The desperation was obvious in Cameron's voice. "I don't want to keep secrets." She shook her head, almost violently. Her entire body had started to quiver. "It was an accident. You have to believe me. It was a _mistake_." How many times had they had this conversation? How many times had Remy not believed her?

"Okay." Remy shut her eyes for a moment as though she was trying to think. She was back to using her pointer finger to emphasize her words again. It was a habit Cameron recognized that she did when she was completely wasted. "Do you understand to meaning of _accident_, Allison?" She opened her eyes again. "Are you telling me your clothes just disappeared and you tripped and fell on his penis, that just so happened to be there?"

"You're mocking me," Cameron muttered.

"I'm not, but if I am, you deserve it," Remy spat. She took several steps closer and Cameron took an equal amount of steps back. But Remy's strides were longer and she stood just centimeters away. The stench of alcohol on her breath was enough to make Cameron feel nauseated. "You're a real _bitch_, you know that?" Remy accused.

"Yeah, well, so are you," Cameron whispered and looked away. They were the wrong words and she knew it.

"_I'm_ the bitch?" Remy huffed in disbelief and pointed at herself. "That why you slept with someone else? It must be _really_ hard to deal with someone who would do anything for you," she deadpanned.

Sometimes Cameron wondered if Remy really did blame herself. Sarcasm was one of her natural defenses. But as many times as she could assure Remy that it hadn't been her, she knew the conversation wouldn't go in any of the directions that she wanted it to. "I admitted I made a mistake," she said slowly and tried to keep her voice level. It cracked anyway. She didn't know why she had been so convinced that she would be given another chance. How often did that happen to people? But she would have never been able to live with herself if she had kept what she had done a secret. And by the time it was over, it was too late to take it back. She could no longer even reason out why she had done it in the first place. At the time, it had made sense. Chase was upset over a patient death in the OR. She was there, with her earnest willing to help. She ran her fingers through her hair and kept shaking her head. It had been a lapse of judgment and she had gotten swept up in the moment. The disgust she felt for herself should have been enough for both her and Remy. "I'm sorry," she whispered and raised her eyebrows to give a heightened sense of resolve. "I'm sorry."

Remy scoffed at the apology. She ran her fingers through her hair and turned to face the side. For a moment she just stared at the front door. Then in one quick movement, she swiped her arm across the end table and sent all that was sitting on top of it flying. Cameron's wallet and reading glasses clattered on the floor.

"Stop it!" Cameron hissed. She stepped forward and grabbed Remy by the arm then shoved her away from the table. Her blood pressure was rising and her cheeks were starting to flush. "What the hell is wrong with you?" she demanded and thrust a hand toward the mess Remy had made.

"What the hell is wrong with _me_?" Remy pointed at herself again. She ripped her arm away from Cameron's grasp. Just to irk her, she finished off the mess by pushing the end table over completely. It hit the floor with a thud. She sneered and tilted her head to the side as though she were demanding to know what Cameron was going to do about it.

Cameron had never been someone who condoned physical violence, or violence of any kind. Not even when she was drunk. But Remy always brought out new sides to her, and not all of them were the best. She slapped Remy's hand away from where the table had been sitting and moved to push her further away from anything else she could destroy.

At the physical contact, Remy spun around and shoved Cameron hard against the wall. A picture frame near her head hit the floor and cracked the glass. Remy stood with her arm against Cameron's upper chest, pinning her where she was. There was a fire in her eyes, but also the shared knowledge that Remy would never hurt her. Not physically anyway. "Push me again and see what happens," Remy dared her.

The temperature in the room had suddenly shot up about ten degrees. Their chests heaved and pressed against each other as both of them breathed heavy with fury. Remy's face was so close to Cameron that she could feel her warm breath on her face. The smell of Vodka and Tequila was suddenly not as evident as it had been earlier. Cameron finally lifted her gaze to stare Remy straight in the eye and she took her up on her dare. She shoved the brunette off of her, but stepped forward at the same time and crashed their lips together. The kiss was hard and sloppy, not unlike their current relationship status. There was no longer a place for tender affection. Before Cameron could deepen the kiss, Remy took her by the arms and shoved her away. Cameron tripped over her own feet and stumbled backward until she fell on the couch. The force nearly tipped it backward.

During the few short steps it took to reach the couch, Remy had already torn her own shirt up over her head and tossed it in a random direction. She straddled Cameron's lap then pushed her down on her back and pressed their lips back together.

Cameron was sick of this routine. She pushed Remy up off of her then wiped at her lips with the back of her hand. Her eyes surveyed the room damage before she looked back up at Remy again. The brunette had shifted so one of her legs was directly between Cameron's legs and it was currently all she could feel. She swallowed then gasped for air as she tried to figure out exactly how she wanted to tell Remy off. She would never escape, so she sat up and resumed the kiss as she pushed them both back into a standing position.

The two of them sidestepped the glimmering shards of glass that littered the floor on their way to the bed. Remy turned them in a circle and pushed Cameron down on her back then climbed on top of her – never breaking the kiss. For Remy, sex was something that could be done on autopilot. She pulled back and looked Cameron over as she roughly tugged her shirt up over her head.

"Remy," Cameron tried to talk to her and shoved her shirt off to the side. She didn't know what to say beyond her name, but that was fine because the conversation was cut off before it could start.

"Shut up," Remy snapped.

"Just let me…"

"_Fuck you_, Allison," Remy growled. She kissed Cameron again to shut her up and bit at her lip hard enough to draw blood to emphasize the point. Cameron's yelp at the sudden pain barely even fazed her. Remy reached behind Cameron and unhooked her bra then slid her hands up under the fabric and over her breasts. The two of them stared at each other, both waiting to see what the other would do next – as if neither knew how this would end.

The line between agitation and arousal was blurred. Cameron glared up at Remy as she pushed her tongue against her lower lip. The metallic taste of blood wasn't even enough to distract her. She couldn't concentrate when their bodies were molded together and Remy's hands were all over her chest. Her heart was pounding and she wondered if Remy could feel it. But Remy didn't seem as interested in taking in the moment. She didn't complicate herself in matters such as feelings. At least not around others. The brunette leaned forward and captured Cameron's lips in another scorching kiss. To Cameron, the kiss quickly became more vital than oxygen.

Their tongues dueled fiercely as they explored each other's mouths in unabashed ferocity. Then Remy had pulled Cameron's bra off and her hands were suddenly everywhere. Cameron followed the suit. She unhooked Remy's bra and ripped it off then threw it somewhere into the oblivion. Her nails raked over Remy's back until her fingers found her hair and entangled themselves in her brown locks. Her head tilted to the side as Remy kissed down her jaw then nipped at the sensitive skin on her neck. She felt as though she was on fire. A moan caught in her throat and she thrust her hips, only to be roughly pinned back against the bed as Remy explored her body with intrepid fingers.

Neither spoke, although Cameron's mind was screaming '_please'_. She slid her hands down Remy's back and traced the skin around the waistband of her pants before struggling to undo the button. Remy made no attempt to stop her. Cameron undid the button on her jeans and yanked down the zipper then eased them down her hips. Her fingers grazed the smooth skin on Remy's thighs and legs, causing her to involuntarily shudder. It was no secret that Remy needed this just as much as Cameron did. Cameron pushed her jeans down as far as they would go then Remy kicked them the rest of the way off. She grinded her hips down against Cameron's and both women moaned against each other's lips.

Cameron arched her hips back up when Remy lifted herself back up. Remy's fingers slid under the thin fabric of her scrubs. She traced circles along the insides of Cameron's thighs. Cameron gasped and arched her entire back up off the bed. _Please. _Remy's touches left sparks of electricity in their wake. The tension she felt increased when Remy slipped off her scrub pants and left her lying exposed beneath her. She slowly lifted her gaze to meet Remy's eyes, but Remy was zeroed in on her breasts, lost somewhere in a world of her own – no doubt distracting herself from her thoughts by focusing on her actions and Cameron's body.

Cameron closed her eyes and ran her hands lightly down Remy's sides, making her shiver. She slid her fingers underneath the lace panties she was wearing then pushed them down her legs. The desire to take control was overwhelming, but the hands massaging her breasts and tracing the contours of her body were making it impossible to do anything but react. The heat between her legs was becoming uncomfortable and she slid her hand down her stomach then underneath her own panties to relieve some of the pressure. Remy grabbed her arms and forced them above her head. She held them there with one hand and their fingers interlaced. Still focused on her own discomfort and need, Cameron snaked a leg around Remy's waist and tried to pull her down closer. Remy moaned softly and began trailing kisses down Cameron's jaw and neck, toward her chest.

It suddenly struck Cameron again how dangerous this situation was. That they couldn't keep doing this. Her muscles tensed but Remy ignored it and kissed down between her breasts, moving down toward her stomach. The pain they were in left them both a seductive combination of beauty and raw need. Cameron could see what they were doing for how dysfunctional it truly was. But by the time it hit her, Remy's fangs were already imbedded far too deeply into her heart to be removed without tearing away her flesh. She wiggled one of her hands free and entangled her fingers in Remy's hair then drew her back up her body again and captured her lips in a desperate kiss that was meant to lose them both in the moment. She didn't want to think or feel anymore. Sex and sleep, they made her feel everything and nothing.

Remy deepened the kiss while simultaneously pushing Cameron's panties down at far as they would go. Cameron pulled her other hand free and managed to wiggle them off the rest of the way – which wasn't easy when Remy's body was preventing her from barely lifting herself up off the bed. She kicked them off then trailed her hands up Remy's sides and around to her stomach. Remy inhaled sharply then kissed Cameron's neck and sucked gently at the pulse point.

"Mm," a barely audible moan vibrated in Cameron's throat. She didn't know when the transition from shoving each other around to being gentle with each other had happened or even _how_ it happened, but it always seemed to. Her lips parted and she tilted her head back against the pillow as Remy's hand found her center and began tracing tantalizing circles. She brushed her hand down Remy's stomach to between her legs and pressed two fingers into her immediately. Remy returned the favor.

Hot tears began to sting Cameron's eyes as they rocked their hips back and forth against their hands, matching each other's movements perfectly. This was far from perfect. She leaned forward and began kissing across Remy's collarbone to refrain from voicing continuous apologies. But with the pleasure and pain radiating through her body from Remy's touch, she didn't think she could speak anyway. The room was silent aside from the occasional moan or whimper that neither of them could seem to hold back. Cameron thrust forward and harder against Remy's hand and tried to focus on the sensations that were radiating throughout her entire body. "Fuck," she managed to choke out, so close. Remy had always teased her about what a dirty mouth she had in bed.

"Faster," Remy begged, but Cameron could barely hear her over the sound of both of their heavy breaths. They picked up speed at the same time, their bodies glistening with sweat and sliding against each other, the friction causing unbearable pleasure.

Cameron was the first to come. Fire ignited inside of her and ravaged her from the inside out. She muffled a cry against Remy's mouth, able to taste the saltiness of her own tears. Remy wasn't far behind, tightening around Cameron's fingers and moaning into the kiss.

They collapsed onto the bed and Remy tucked her face against Cameron's neck for a moment as they tried to catch their breath.

Then she pulled away.

Despite how Cameron longed to wrap her arms around her, Remy turned onto her side with her back toward Cameron and inched her way over toward the side of the bed. She wrestled with the blankets as through she was oblivious to Cameron's desperate, painful stare at the back of her head. As though nothing had happened, Remy slipped her arms around a pillow and shut her eyes.

They could not keep doing this although Cameron knew that they would. She remained on her back as she slid the blanket up over herself then wrapped her arms around her chest. It would take someone finally saying no, and she knew that neither of them would be the one to take on the pain of doing so. She sniffled and scrubbed at her face then snuggled back into her pillow and closed her eyes. It was hard to sleep when she knew that all she had to do was roll over and she would be cuddled up against the love of her life who no longer wanted her. Her arms crossed tighter across her chest and she hugged herself as her shoulders began to shake. One of these nights, she would drown in her own guilt and regret. Until then, she would just exhaust herself with crying until she fell asleep. She briefly wondered if Remy felt even an inkling of forgiveness, but she drifted off into a fitful slumber before she could fully accept that she would never have her absolution.

xxxxx

It was a loud clatter that woke Cameron the next morning. She immediately furrowed her brows and rolled onto her side with her back to the window. Light was streaming in through her curtains and it already felt as though someone had taken a sledgehammer to her head. Her hand reached out to the side and fell on Remy's empty half of the bed. It was still warm. Stifling a groan, she opened her eyes to catch Remy picking her phone up off the floor. She looked like a deer caught in the headlights when she noticed Cameron was awake. Both of their cheeks flushed. The two of them stared at each other as they waited for the other to speak before Remy quickly stuffed her phone into the pocket of her jeans. She finished slipping on her shirt and glanced briefly around the room before making a beeline out the door.

Cameron opened her mouth and searched for the right words to say, but it was too late. The door slammed shut a little too hard, and Cameron was left alone in her mess of an apartment. She sighed and pressed the heels of her hands against her aching eyes but refused to reprimand herself for not stopping Remy from leaving. For not taking action last night. Next week would be another chance. At the rate they were going, there would always be one more night.


End file.
